帮我修改一篇文章…谢谢

题目

帮我修改一篇文章…谢谢
请 感激不尽.请尽量赐教
Today is an appropriate day to go to the beach,so Jason and Paul decided to go to the beach to play,when they arrived at the beach,there already very many people.Some people bought things at the snack bar; some people played the water in the seashore.Jason and Paul in the sea water after playing for a while.Jason proposed to hire a small boat to sea.Paul agreed to consider,so they went to hire a small boat.
The boss told them:"today is not suitable goes to sea.” Jason asked:“why?” The boss replied:“there are the shark appeared today.Therefore today should better not go to sea”.Jason and Paul were very disappointed,but they didn’t give up this idea.They continued to beg the boss.Finally the boss hired the ship to them and advised them:"Do not go to far places." They rented a boat on the sea; they paddled their boat cheerfully and forgot about the boss’ exhortation completely.
Suddenly,Paul shouted:” Here the shark came!We ran away quickly!” The s

答案

感觉开头总是说到beach,有点重复.可以把decided to go to the beach to play改成decided to go there and play.when they arrived at the beach改成when they arrivedJason proposed to hire a small boat to sea.Pa...