帮我看一下这篇英语作文有什么要改进的地方.

题目

帮我看一下这篇英语作文有什么要改进的地方.
How to Be Successful in Your Life
Hello,everyone!I'm Zhu Zhentao.I come from Class One,Grade Eight.Today I will talk about success.I think everyone want to be successful in life.And how to be successful in your life?First,you should fix a aim.Second,you should try your best to achieve the aim.Third,don't give up!The achievement of a aim comes at a price,it will cost you much time,and you shouldn't think that it's hard to achieve the aim.You should think that you are the best!That's all!Thank you!

答案

英文和中文还是有些区别的,中文什么样,翻译成英文的话,稍微变一下,比方我来自一年级八班,这个来自 被你翻译成 come from 实际上可以这样 am in 这样好些 针对自己的程度 用一些你所会的单词短语 写作文不要硬生生的...