求英语高手点评下小弟的作文

题目

求英语高手点评下小弟的作文
In the contemporary world,in this time of revolution of thinking,not only enjoyed in the convenience and easiness provided by the modern technology and manufacture,also do the people concentrate on the environmental protections more than any other times they did.However,in the meanwhile,some assert that the production of consumer of goods become so prevalent in present-day that may pose a grave threat to the environment.From my observation,I totally agree their assertion from mainly three perspectives.
In the first place,the process of most production of consumer of goods constitutes hazardous pollution in the air.Take plastic products for instance,according to the scientific research that the raw material of the plastic,when it has being molten,will emit minimum radiation and poisonous chemical compositions which once inhaled will remain in lungs and cause cancers.So if such manufactories located in the downtown,then its citizens----regardless of adults or childr

答案

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