谁能帮我改改这段英语作文?

题目

谁能帮我改改这段英语作文?
To begin with,income earned by working is the guarantee of people’s source of food,clothes,and shelter.But when the most basic survival demand is satisfied,people’s demand would be shift to a higher level --- the sense of achievement,external social status and internal respect,which all come from people’s job.This can perfectly explain the reason why tons of children are still willing to build their own career even if their parents had earned enough money for their entire life.

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