我刚写了一篇六级作文,谁能帮我判一下错误?

题目

我刚写了一篇六级作文,谁能帮我判一下错误?
Surfing On The Web
There is no denying the fact that surfing on the web has been become the hotly debated topic in china.Some people hold the view that surfing on the web is entertaining for adults and children.Without that,life would become dull and cheerless.Others,however,they maintain that we should use internet to study and to learn knowledge that full necessary of it.Taking a look around,we can find examples too numerous to list:reading books,watching movies,learning english,reading newspapers and so on.Surfing on the web just for entertaining is a waste of time and resource.I believe that we should not go to extreme.On the one hand,surfing on the internet can improve our abilities that we can learn a lot of knowledge to open us eyes.It is useful to us to know someone else experiences and to study knowledge.On the other hand,when we're tired,we also could play some small games to make us relax and cheerful.Internet is a good thing,and we should let it useful.

答案

标题改为 surfing the webhas been become 改成 has becomethey maintain 改为 maintainto learn knowledge that full necessary of it 改为to master a good knowledgelearn knowledge 是比较中国化在说法,用master...