能帮我看一下,这篇作文有错吗

题目

能帮我看一下,这篇作文有错吗
The computer was among the greatest inventions of the twentieth century.It is a very useful channel for study.
The computer has many advantages.You can use the computer to do online shopping.You can chat with Net'pals all over the world.You can buy all kinds of things on the Internet.For example,you can order food,books and CDs online.
In brief,computers have made our lives easier and more enjoyable.

答案

among改为one of并把was改成isof the twentieth century介词改为in,it is a very useful channel……这句话有点像中式英语,可以用It is absolutly helpful for our study.三句you can 前可以加一些连词,最后一个可以...