英语作文修改（四级标准）

题目

英语作文修改（四级标准）
Interests
There is no doublt that everyone has his own interests.Mybe your interests are different from your special field of study or work.But the interests will make us happy.
In our life,it is the true interest that makes us forget time and ourself and steep it completely.By interests,we can open up our angle of view to feel the world.That is say to develop your interests will help you make way in the world.And if you cultivate your various interests properly,you will probaly find it easier to find a job or profession.
But on the other hand ,everything has two side.Too much emphasis placed on interests may let us decadent.
In my opinion,only do it on appropriate time,can we get real fun and develope our ability.

答案

文章不错,但是词句稍显单薄,下文给你稍稍强化一下
There is no denying that everyone has interests that enrich our life with happiness.Maybe everyone possesses different interests from other people depending on individual preferences such as special field of study or work.However,interests are an neccessarities tie up to an individual's satifaction.
In our life,our interests have been playing a very important role that fill up our leisure time and allow us to sleep soundly.With interests,we are eager to explore the areas that fascinate us and interests are the key to open our mind and feel the world,which connotates that developing interests will benefit us from seeking the new path in this mysterious world.In light of this statement,if you develop a positive interest,the interest will drive you to the success.
On the opposite side,just like a two-side blade.Some interests should be eliminated becasue it has the potential to ruin our life.Such as playing computer games,hanging out with bad guys and eating with irregularity.
From my perspective,we are likely to benefit from the interest we have developed.While,we also should pay attention to refrain the growth of bad interests.