翻译有无语法错误,帮我改正下

题目

翻译有无语法错误,帮我改正下
i grow up and finish my study in a beautiful and relatively simple city..during my college years, i study science and economic theory hard,and hope that the living standard will be improved through the advancement of western science and technology.i am fond of the people in the living environment and traditional culture.moreover,i look forward to the progress which can bring about great changes.i hope i can learn professional knowledge seriously in the international stage and make contribution to the society. What is more,i own strong ability at study and teamwork.not only would i like to communicate with others and contact with different people and different companies,learn advanced ideas and financial knowledge,but also to devote myself to the development of the company and advancement of the society.

答案

i am fond of the people in the living environment and traditional culture后面的定语不顺,and后加with什么的make contribution to the society贡献可数,我查了not only would i like to communicate with others...