How to apologize properly is much more difficult than we think. Provided you wan

题型：不详难度：来源：

How to apologize properly is much more difficult than we think. Provided you want to teach your children to apologize, you must be good at saying sorry yourself, especially to your own children. But how you say it can be quite tricky.
If you say to your children “I’m sorry I got angry with you, but …” what follows that “but” can make the apology ineffective: “I had a bad day” or “your noise was giving me a headache ” leaves the person feeling that he should be apologizing for his bad behavior in expecting an apology.
Another method by which people appear to apologize without actually doing so is to say “I’m sorry you’re upset”; this suggests that you are somehow at fault for allowing yourself to get upset by what the other person has done.
Then there is the general, all covering apology, which avoids the necessity of identifying a specific act that was particularly hurtful or insulting, and which the person who is apologizing should promise never to do again. Saying “I’m useless as a parent” does not make any sense.
These false apologies are used by people who believe saying sorry shows weakness. Parents who wish to teach their children to apologize should see it as a sign of strength, and therefore not voice these false apologies.
But even when presented with examples of really being sorry, children still need help to become aware of the complexities of saying sorry. A three-year-old might need help in understanding that other children feel pain just as he does, and that hitting a playmate over the head with a heavy toy requires an apology. A six-year-old might need reminding that spoiling other children’s expectations can require an apology. A 12-year-old might need to be shown that taking the biscuit without asking permission is acceptable, but that borrowing a parent’s clothes without permission is not.
小题1: If a mother adds “but” to an apology,________.

A．the child may feel that he owes her an apology

B．she knows that the child has been hurt

C．the child may find the apology easier to accept

D．she feels that she should have apologized

小题2:According to the author, saying “I’m sorry you’re upset” most probably means “_______”.

A．You have good reason to get upset

B．I apologize for hurting your feelings

C．I’m aware you’re upset , but I’m not to blame

D．I’m at fault for making you upset

小题3: We learn from the last paragraph that iiS teaching children to say sorry  
A.  the complexities involved should be ignored
B.  parents need to set them a good example
C.  their ages should be taken into account
D parents should be patient and tolerant
小题4:It can be inferred from the passage that apologizing properly is  

A． to say sorry in a general way

B． a way to improve your relationships

C． a sign of social progress and social harmony

D．not as simple as it seems

答案

小题1:A
小题2:C
小题3:C
小题4:D

解析

恰当地表示自己的歉意会比我们原来认为的更为困难，在文章中提出了几种无效的道歉行为，说明道歉并不像我们认为的那么简单。
小题1:A
【试题解析】推理题。根据文章第二段what follows that “but” can make the apology ineffective: “I had a bad day” or “your noise was giving me a headache ” leaves the person feeling that he should be apologizing for his bad behavior in expecting an apology.可知你but后面的内容会让别人认为他们需要向你道歉以回应你的歉意。这不是一种真诚的道歉方式，也不会有很好的效果。故A正确。
小题2:C
【试题解析】推理题。根据文章第三段Another method by which people appear to apologize without actually doing so is to say “I’m sorry you’re upset”; this suggests that you are somehow at fault for allowing yourself to get upset by what the other person has done.可知说出“I’m sorry you’re upset”说明你认为对方的难受不是你的错。这也不是一种很有效的真诚的道歉的方式。故C正确。
小题3:C
【试题解析】推理题。根据最后一段中的A three-year-old 和A six-year-old以及A 12-year-old可知当我们向孩子道歉的时候，要考虑到他们的年龄，对于不同年龄的孩子要使用不同的道歉的方式。故C正确。
小题4:D
【试题解析】推理题。根据文章第一段How to apologize properly is much more difficult than we think.
可知恰当地表示自己的歉意会比我们原来认为的更为困难。接着在文章中提出了几种无效的道歉行为。说明本文说明道歉并不像我们认为的那么简单。故D正确。
【长难句解析】
How to apologize properly is much more difficult than we think.
【翻译】如何恰当地道歉要比我们认为地要更加困难。
【分析】本句的主语是“特殊疑问词+不定式” how to apologize properly；这个结构还可以在句中做主语，宾语，表语或定语。