Hightech machines have made life easier for millions around the world. However, some people still
prefer lowtech ways of doing things. Here"s an example of why this is happening. You can microwave a
frozen hamburger in 60 seconds. However, it won"t taste as good as the one you cook on the stove. And if you"re in that much of a hurry, you probably won"t take time to toast the bun. Hightech cooking saves
time, but it doesn"t make bettertasting meals.
Most people get their news from hightech sources like television or the Internet. This has many
advantages. For example, electronic news is more up to date than newspapers or magazines. It"s also more exciting to see live and videotaped news events than photographs. However, newspapers and magazines
have some important advantages. They give more background and details. They also let you read the parts that are important to you and skip the rest.
Other hightech timesavers have similar disadvantages. For example, most people use the phone or
email to stay in touch with friends and family members who live in other places. But when you use the
Internet or the phone, you don"t always think carefully about what you are saying, and sometimes you
forget the important things you want to communicate. Similarly, when you wordprocess a homework
assignment instead of handwriting it, you can check your spelling electronically and put in fancy headins.
However, some students are so busy with the computer that they don"t pay enough attention to the
actual words they are writing.
Deciding what to watch on TV is a battle of wills that is fought in homes all over the world.
According to psychologists (心理学家), it is much more serious than simply deciding between
a soap opera and a sports program, or between pop music and politics. This television conflict
is part of a bigger power game which goes on in homes, even though most of the players do not
realize that they are playing a game at all. "It"s such a game as is not easy to notice," says
psychologist Dr David Lewis, "that many people don"t even know they"re playing it."
Unconsciously, people begin to play the game as soon as they meet their future husband or
wife. By the time the couple get married, the rules of game are already formed. The big decision,
like where to live and which school to send the children to, are usually joint decision. When it
comes to less important things, it"s a different matter. Here is just one example of this process at
work. A husband looks through a pile of holiday brochures (小册子) and announces his preference:
"The South of France". And his wife quickly agrees before he realizes that the only brochures she
gave him were those for the South of France. Similarly, she may decide on how the home should
be decorated, but he chooses the new car and decides what the family does at weekends.
"Family power struggles are interesting," says Dr Lewis. "Of course, some people are naturally
more dominant (占支配地位的) than others, and the most dominant personality in a family tries
to lead. These days, even though so many couples make a special effort to have a true and equal
partnership, men generally have a greater need to appear to be in physical control. Women, on the
other hand, are not so interested in physical control as in emotional control. On the whole, they"re
more controlling and can make the man think of something as his idea in the first place."
Too many people want others to be their friends, but they don"t give friendship back. That is
why some friendships do not last very long. To have a friend, you must learn to be one. You must
learn to treat your friend the way you want your friend treat you. Learning to be a good friend
means learning three rules. Be honest; be generous; be understanding.
Honesty is where a good friendship starts. Friends must be able to trust one another. If you do
not tell the truth, people usually find it out. If a friend finds out that you haven"t been honest, you
may lose your friends" trust. Good friends always believe in one another as they always speak and
act honestly.
Generosity means sharing, which makes a friendship grow. People do not have to give lunch
money for clothes, of course. Instead you have to learn how to share things you enjoy, like your
hobbies and your interest. Then, naturally you will want to share your ideas and feelings. These
can be very valuable to a friend. They tell your friend what is important to you. By sharing them,
you help your friend know you better.
Sooner or later, every one needs understanding and help with a problem. Something may go
wrong at school. Talking about the problem can make it easier to solve. Turning to a friend can
be a first step in solving the problem. So to be a friend you must listen and understand. You must
try to put yourself in your friend"s place so you can understand the problem better.
No two friendships are ever exactly alike. But all true friendships have three things in common.
If you plan to keep your friends, you must practice honesty, generosity, and understanding.
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